Tech Support

All your rage are belong to us.

And now, an excerpt from an actual conversation I really had with the ever friendly people on the phone:

Me (after about a month of not receiving any help on a problem which was getting kind of big considering it was the end of the year and so on): "Hello, is Katya there?"

Ever friendly soldier: "Yes, just a second. Who's calling?"
Me: "Gail"
Friendly soldier: "...Katya isn't here."